Yesterday we had a "Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad" morning that ended with a Christlike Kindness
Last Saturday morning SHOULD have been an ordinary Saturday morning. The children have "Saturday chores" that they are required to do before they move on with their day. There are a few exceptions. This morning Spencer had an exception because his scout troop led by Destry went on a rock climbing expedition. It was a gorgeous day! They had a great time thanks to Destry's former missionary companion and friend, Dallin Ward, who shared his talents and expertise with the group. Spencer was the star as I was told.
For those of us who stayed behind, it should have been chore time after they left. They were all playing together nicely for a while and I just let them. It is fun to see them getting along and playing well. At around 10:00 I reminded them to get get started because Emma had her first basketball game of the season and Estelle had a birthday party that both started at 1:00. That should have been no problem. They are expected to have their chores done by noon anyway. Well, that is not what happened. I don't know if the stars were not in alignment, or they had eaten too much Halloween candy, or if a wicked witch had cast an evil spell on our home, or because they knew that I was not feeling 100% they figured they could get away with not doing their chores, but for whatever reason, the children started bugging each other and the tattle-fest began. There was not a whole lot of crying or meanness, just a lot of mischievousness. Of course no one took any responsibility for themselves; the blame was placed on everyone else. And of course all the shenanigans of everyone else prohibited each of them from doing their own chores. By noon I reminded both girls who had one o'clock activities that they may want to kick it in gear. Well, Estelle just laughed and carried on. Emma on the other hand had a full blown preteen girl meltdown. Taylor put make-up in her ear and tried to make her eat some and she thought he should be punished even though she had put make up on him first. I doubt she learned her lesson. Big boys do not like make up and big boys always get even and then some. Nothing was her fault and she was the only one who ever did any work around here. Emma walked out the door not telling me where she was going (she wandered around the backyard). 1:00 came and went. Well, Estelle, at 12:50 got dressed combed her hair and told me she was ready for the party, never mind her room wasn't clean, and the kitchen wasn't properly mopped.
It broke MY heart not to take Estelle to her party and Emma to her basketball game. Estelle is a party girl and Emma had been so excited for her first basketball game. I so wished they had made better choices.
Today was the scheduled annual yard clean up at my mom's. Kent was down from Idaho and everyone was to gather around 10:00 to help rake leaves, pull weeds, winterize the sprinklers, mow the lawn, etc. Well not wanting to miss Emma's first game I told them we wouldn't be there until after 2:00. I was mad that the reason for my not being there ended up not really existing. I was ready to just get in the car with Sarah, not because she had faithfully done her chores, but because she is six and I couldn't in good conscience leave her home. But everyone realized the error of their ways and kicked it in gear. I gave them a 30 minute time frame that actually extended another 30 minutes, but they were working hard now. I guess they realized that I really would have left them since the two girls missed their earlier activities. Sarah continued to dawdle and I told her that she would not be left home alone, but that she would not get to play in the leaves that were raked. She would have to stay in the house. She had been looking forward to the leaves for days. Well, her sisters sensing her pain helped her to finish her chores so she would be able to fully participate when we got to grandmas.
Their kindness touched my heart. Even though they had both missed out on something they really wanted to do, they did not take it out on Sarah. Instead they had compassion for her and helped her. I pointed out that they were her savior. The chores needed to be done, and we split up the chores so everyone is a participant. But today Sarah's chores still got done and she was spared the consequence of not being able to play in the leaves. All of us make mistakes and our Savior paid the price for them for us so that we do not have to be punished if we repent. This is a portion of the atonement in very simplistic form, but I am going to have a family home evening about it soon and use this as an example that I think they will grasp.
So, Taylor, Emma, Estelle, Sarah eventually made it to my mom's on Saturday and enjoyed our time there. The leaves were all raked up, but the weather was warm and the park welcomed the little ones. It is always good to see Kent. He was only there with Brayden due to Brandon's illness. We missed the rest of that clan. Destry and Spencer made it home safe and sound and had a quiet afternoon at home. What started out as a "terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day" turned out to be quite splendid!
For those of us who stayed behind, it should have been chore time after they left. They were all playing together nicely for a while and I just let them. It is fun to see them getting along and playing well. At around 10:00 I reminded them to get get started because Emma had her first basketball game of the season and Estelle had a birthday party that both started at 1:00. That should have been no problem. They are expected to have their chores done by noon anyway. Well, that is not what happened. I don't know if the stars were not in alignment, or they had eaten too much Halloween candy, or if a wicked witch had cast an evil spell on our home, or because they knew that I was not feeling 100% they figured they could get away with not doing their chores, but for whatever reason, the children started bugging each other and the tattle-fest began. There was not a whole lot of crying or meanness, just a lot of mischievousness. Of course no one took any responsibility for themselves; the blame was placed on everyone else. And of course all the shenanigans of everyone else prohibited each of them from doing their own chores. By noon I reminded both girls who had one o'clock activities that they may want to kick it in gear. Well, Estelle just laughed and carried on. Emma on the other hand had a full blown preteen girl meltdown. Taylor put make-up in her ear and tried to make her eat some and she thought he should be punished even though she had put make up on him first. I doubt she learned her lesson. Big boys do not like make up and big boys always get even and then some. Nothing was her fault and she was the only one who ever did any work around here. Emma walked out the door not telling me where she was going (she wandered around the backyard). 1:00 came and went. Well, Estelle, at 12:50 got dressed combed her hair and told me she was ready for the party, never mind her room wasn't clean, and the kitchen wasn't properly mopped.
It broke MY heart not to take Estelle to her party and Emma to her basketball game. Estelle is a party girl and Emma had been so excited for her first basketball game. I so wished they had made better choices.
Today was the scheduled annual yard clean up at my mom's. Kent was down from Idaho and everyone was to gather around 10:00 to help rake leaves, pull weeds, winterize the sprinklers, mow the lawn, etc. Well not wanting to miss Emma's first game I told them we wouldn't be there until after 2:00. I was mad that the reason for my not being there ended up not really existing. I was ready to just get in the car with Sarah, not because she had faithfully done her chores, but because she is six and I couldn't in good conscience leave her home. But everyone realized the error of their ways and kicked it in gear. I gave them a 30 minute time frame that actually extended another 30 minutes, but they were working hard now. I guess they realized that I really would have left them since the two girls missed their earlier activities. Sarah continued to dawdle and I told her that she would not be left home alone, but that she would not get to play in the leaves that were raked. She would have to stay in the house. She had been looking forward to the leaves for days. Well, her sisters sensing her pain helped her to finish her chores so she would be able to fully participate when we got to grandmas.
Their kindness touched my heart. Even though they had both missed out on something they really wanted to do, they did not take it out on Sarah. Instead they had compassion for her and helped her. I pointed out that they were her savior. The chores needed to be done, and we split up the chores so everyone is a participant. But today Sarah's chores still got done and she was spared the consequence of not being able to play in the leaves. All of us make mistakes and our Savior paid the price for them for us so that we do not have to be punished if we repent. This is a portion of the atonement in very simplistic form, but I am going to have a family home evening about it soon and use this as an example that I think they will grasp.
So, Taylor, Emma, Estelle, Sarah eventually made it to my mom's on Saturday and enjoyed our time there. The leaves were all raked up, but the weather was warm and the park welcomed the little ones. It is always good to see Kent. He was only there with Brayden due to Brandon's illness. We missed the rest of that clan. Destry and Spencer made it home safe and sound and had a quiet afternoon at home. What started out as a "terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day" turned out to be quite splendid!
just wanted to let you know that you taught me an important parenting lesson that day. I knew it wasn't easy for you. Thank you for being a great example and wonderful mother, I look up to you so much! - Also I felt horrible after I said "Oh you should have just come at 10am then." I am sorry I said that!
ReplyDeleteJessica, thank you for your kind words. You are a terrific mom to Mac and aunt to the rest of the gang. Don't feel bad for saying that, I thought the same thing myself!
ReplyDelete